I am no longer cool

I just wanted to officially announce that I am no longer cool. Yep, been stripped of my title and all associated traits. No, it's not because I'm purposefully, intentionally sitting at home on New Year's Eve (writing a blog, no less). It's got more to do with the Christmas gifts I received this year. But it's not even that the gifts I got were uncool (they were)...it's because of how sincerely excited I was about them. Sure, a pocket protector is an uncool gift, but you're not cool if you're given one. You're uncool if you're excited about it. And I was darn excited about what I got.

This year, there were no gadgets. No digital cameras, no cool phones. No clothes (save for a sweater from my sister and a robe from my parents)-- my usual request. This year was the year of domesticity. I fully realized the extent of my uncoolness when I saw what I'd received in total while I was at my grandparent's house and we'd finished up our final gift exchange.

This Christmas was the Christmas of books. Among other things, from Tyler I received three books-- Marley and Me, Multiple Blessings, and The Lucky One. Then from my dad and Jodi, among other things, I received Change of Heart, The Friday Night Knitting Club (the first one and its sequel), and The Purpose of Christmas. From my grandparents I also received a book, a duplicate of one I'd already received, but that's fine. It just means I get to go pick out another book... Tyler also received three Vince Flynn books, an author I'd never heard of, but apparently is the biggest thing since sliced bread, because I've seen his stuff everywhere since then. My sisters and I also decided we'd like to read a book together over Christmas break, so I'd just finished reading Mercy a few days before the onslaught of my new library. You'd think school would make me hate reading, but quite the opposite has occurred. It's just non-fiction, academic reading I'm beginning to already despise.

Sure, you're supposed to tell your kids it is indeed cool to read, but when asked what you got for Christmas, "About ten books or so!" doesn't quite conjure up an "Oh wow!" response. More like, "Oh...cool...," which we all know doesn't really mean "Oh cool." At least not when you're when you're as young and cool as I used to be.

But whatever, I can rebound. I can make up for it. "What else did you get?" Just listen! From my mom, I received some really pretty spreading knives with a G monogram and a cocktail napkin holder also monogrammed with a G (containing napkins monogrammed with a G, of course), as well as some pretty stationary with my name imprinted on them. From my aunt, I received another set of the Christmas dinnerware I'm collecting, as well as some matching glasses. Woohoo!! (I'm not being sarcastic here).

Okay, so she likes to entertain... That's not entirely uncool. But then, just when I thought all of the gifts had been distributed and I sat contently on the couch, my sister dropped a very large and heavy bag in front of me. "This is for me?" "It's just a last minute gift...," my mom said. I looked in and wrapped inside was a pretty big box-- by far the largest thing I'd received in the last few years (these days, my favorite gifts come in envelopes...). I started to pull the tissue off and... it.... was....

(Can you handle the suspense?)

"A SEWING MACHINE!!! NO WAY!!!"

Seriously...I was excited about this unexpected gift. Seriously. Mind you, I've never so much as stitched a hem much less touched a sewing machine. I usually discard a shirt if the button falls off. But lately, I'd come to the conclusion that I'm such a do-it-yourself-er, why don't I know how to sew? I like to paint walls, refurbish furniture and mirrors, tear down wallpaper... I should be able to make pillow covers and curtains, darn it! I casually mentioned it to my mom (who is a sewing PRO-- made all of my dresses growing up, can recover furniture, makes gorgeous pillows, duvets, and often has people pay her to make their fancy dancy curtains that hang in the windows of their gated community houses) when we were in New York the week earlier and she sure enough followed through! I didn't think I'd decided I wanted one early enough to officially ask for it for Christmas, it was more like a last minute revelation, but... I GOT A SEWING MACHINE!!

My nineteen year old, female, college freshman cousin was sitting at my feet and witnessed each gift I unwrapped. I think I lost any and all respect I had from her when I freaked out over my new sewing machine. I mean, I'm not THAT much older than her. I imagine her thought process throughout the evening went something like this:

"Okay, you got some books...that's cool. Whatever. Alright, you got some cocktail party accessories and place settings... I guess that's cool if you have your own house... Aaaaand... a sewing machine? Yeah... I don't know how to pardon that one. What, are you going to start knitting next? She is like a fifty year old in a twenty five year old body. She might as well be my mom. Better yet, my grandma. She might have some cute boots on, but she is not cool."

Whatever. I think I love my sewing machine. I was only able to squeeze in one lesson before we headed back to DC, but I'm optimistic. True, I had no pre-existing knowledge of what a bobbin was, but I'm hoping the sewing gene isn't recessive. It was a brief lesson, but so cool to learn all of the little flips and turns and snips that make up sewing. I've seen my mom do that dance my whole life and I'm excited to carry on the tradition. My goal is to make either two pillows or one valence for our kitchen window before I head back to school on the 12th.

So there it is... I'm an uncool, reading, entertaining, sewing, married twenty-five year old. Maybe this means the big 3-0 won't phase me.

Doubtful.

Four Christmases

So we're in the car again- can you believe it? Except this time we're on I-95 working our way back home- YAY!! It has been so wonderful to spend time with as many family members as possible, but this girl is tired of living out of a suitcase and eating gas station food. I swear, I'm getting pressure soars from sitting in this car... And I have gained some serious lbs this Christmas! I told my sister I might as well be a quadripalegic who just eats candy all day.

Anyway, here's how our Christmas panned out. After our Christmas for just the two of us in DC, we were in Holdrege from the 20th through the 24th and did Christmas with our immediate family there (Randy, Debby, Kara etc...). On Christmas Eve, we drove to Columbus, NE and had Christmas with the whole family. We went to Grandpa and Grandma Grassmeyer's church for the Christmas Eve service, came home for the traditional night of soup/chili eating, mass picture taking, and Chinese auction gift exchange. I made my first mistake here by trying to be funny.

So, it's common knowledge that with Chinese auction/White Elephant gift exchanges, couples have a great advantage because they can gang up and work together. So after Tyler opened these stocking hangers (which he was really excited about), I was doing my wifely duty to try to pedal these lovely stocking hangers to everyone else. It was Debby's turn to choose a gift and I was doing my best to convince her that these lovely, hand crafted paired Christmas stocking hangers were what she really wanted. She wasn't buying it, saying something about having enough at home and not needing any more, to which I replied, "But I'm pregnant with twins!" and rubbed my belly. Wrong thing to say. Everyone in the vicinity seemed to freeze, silence, and turn to stare at me, including my own husband who was sitting next to me. He looked at me with this shocked look, like "WHAT are you DOING?!" I quickly blurted out that I was just kidding and sank into the sofa. Joke didn't seem to go over well. I mean, two stocking holders, says she doesn't need any, joke that I'm pregnant with twins... C'mon. I was trying to be funny. Oh well. Note to self: no pregnancy jokes in Nebraska.

On Christmas morning we had a quick breakfast and left Columbus for our 16 hour drive to Atlanta. The trip was fairly uneventful save for the fact that NOTHING is open on Christmas except for gas stations, so we had lovely meals consisting of beef jerky and Combos. Mmmmm. Nothing says Christmas dinner like some dried salted meat and cheese-filled pretzels. Throw in some trail mix and zebra cakes and you've got yourself a bonafide feast. We did finally find a Jack-in-the-Box that was open in Nashville at 11:30 that night, where we waited in the drive through for an hour.

So we did our traditional Christmas with my family on the 26th. We open real gifts and then do White Elephant, which is so much fun. Some gifts you really want (Starbuck's cards, iTunes cards...), others you're SOL if you open them (aka- the pineapple cookbook, Randy). By far the funniest gift was a pair of slippers made out of maxi pads with a very funny description that my mom made.Kelsey's new boyfriend was the one who ended up with them, poor thing. I'm sure his mother was thrilled to see what he brought home after having Christmas with the Smiths.

We hung out in Atlanta for a few days, had a great brunch at my aunt's house, played mass games of Rummikub, went to Landon's wedding dress fitting (it's gorgeous- Click here to see it! ), went to a fun concert with Becky and Randy at Eddie's Attic, went to church and randomly ran into an old friend I hadn't seen since her wedding two years ago, and had lunch with my fun friend Christie.

We had to make a hard decision on Sunday: head back to DC as planned and tackle horrible traffic on I-95 or head elsewhere for a day or two? We could drive to Savannah and spend a day there, drive to Charlotte and spend the night with friends? I was dying to get home, but I knew the drive home would be so much easier if we waited a day or two and I was already losing my car patience. So we drove to Savannah on Sunday. Good decision. I got to see my mom's great Christmas decorations and spend time at home, see the dogs, sleep in my old bed, spend time downtown, and spend more time with Charles, Landon, Becky, Randy, Mom, and Rick. I'm so glad we decided to extend our trip just a few days more. And in just a few hours, we'll be HOME! I can unpack my suitcase, sleep in my own bed, and be lazy for another 12 days...

Hope all of your Christmases were just as fun and family-filled!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas friends... From our gang to yours!

We didn't have time to get out a Christmas card this year (the usual excuses...). And since Tyler has proven his Clark Griswold tendencies during our Christmas travels, the picture is especially appropriate! We're in Nebraska this morning (where it's cold and white), but we're leaving soon for our sixteen hour drive to Atlanta (where it's warm and rainy). Nothing says Merry Christmas like a day on the interstate...

Please know that we're thinking of you on this special holiday and wish you a joy-filled (stress-free, fire-free, SWAT team-free, jelly-of-the-month-club-free) day with your friends and family.

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

Isaiah 9:6

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Once upon a time, there was a husband and a wife. The husband was from Nebraska, the wife was from Georgia, and they had family spread aaaall over the country. In order to see as much family as possible, still maintain a balance in their checking account, and not max out their credit cards, they decided to drive from Washington, to Nebraska, to Georgia, and back to DC for Christmas. So, on December 19th, they set out on a long, cold, tiresome journey to Holdrege, Nebraska-- a 23 hour drive.

The husband and wife set out on their journey, leaving Arlington at 10 am on Friday morning. Along their journey, they had milestones every few hundred miles during which to take bathroom breaks, fill up with gas, or just mentally note the progress they'd made. Snack break in Nowhere, West Virginia, gas stop in Dayton, Ohio, dinner in Indianapolis... After Indy, their next planned gas stop and closest major city was Peoria, Illinois, along Interstate 74. Peoria was about 200 miles from Indianapolis, where they had about a half a tank of gas left.

So, around 11:30 that night, the wife, being a good wife and a natural night owl, decided she'd take over the driving at midnight, but needed to shut her eyes for a few minutes to make sure she was awake and alert enough to take the wheel. So, she reclined her seat, bundled up under her husband's big wool coat, and closed her eyes for a quick winter's nap. She popped up a bit later, relaxed and ready to relieve her dutiful husband from driving. She looked out to find herself surrounded by vast, dark farmland and inches of snow on the ground. No lights, few cars, and many miles between each exit sign. And then, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash. What could that be? It was the GPS system of the car, flashing that they were low on gas, and needed to be re-routed to the nearest gas station. "You have only 11 miles of gas left," the GPS read. "How could that be," the wife asked? "Well, I forgot to pullover in Peoria," the husband nervously laughed. Luckily, the GPS found the closest gas station to be seven miles away-- close enough for the car to make it.

The next exit was several miles away, so the husband slowly pulled off of the icy interstate onto the cold, dark exit ramp as soon as they approached it. The wife, now awake, alert, and with a rapidly increasing heartbeat, saw no gas station in sight. Only more darkness, farmland, and icy roads. No lights. No cars. Just Route 97. The husband slowly crept along the two lane road, repeatedly checking the GPS to be sure they were indeed being directed toward a gas station and checking to see if they had enough gas to make it wherever they were going. The further down the road they drove, the further from the interstate they were, and the more nervous they became. It was now past midnight and they were most definitely in the middle of the nowhere. Barbed wire fencing lined the road on each side, only passing an occasional old trailer, farmhouse, or abandoned, snow-covered car (which made them feel a lot better).

Neither one of them said a single word as they drove deeper and deeper into the frozen darkness. Only the wife sat there with visions of the movie "Vacancy" flashing in her head and thoughts they went something like this:

"HOW THE &!#@* DO YOU FORGET TO PULLOVER FOR GAS?? I CLOSE MY EYES FOR TWENTY MINUTES AND YOU FORGET TO GET GAS??? WHAT IF WE RUN OUT? DO WE HAVE TO GET OUT AND WALK? DOES ONE OF US GET OUT AND THE OTHER STAY? THERE'S NO WAY IN %@#! I'M STAYING BEHIND BY MYSELF. DEAR GOD, PLEASE HELP US. PLEASE HELP US... HOW THE @#!&% DO YOU FORGET TO GET GAS??"

Finally, miles and miles down route 97, they pulled into a zero stoplight town. Maquon, Illinois, population 350. No signs of life, just empty cars, lightless street lamps, closed stores, and lots of snow. Not a creature was stirring (not even a mouse). And then, what to my wondering eyes should appear, praise God, the Maquon Miracle Mart. They roll in on literally, their last drops of gas. The pumps look old and tired and the wife initially thinks they won't take credit cards. But upon closer inspection, they find they do. Thank God! Except, wait...there's a pink sign taped to the pump... What does it say?

"Sorry, Out of Gas."

"WE'RE GOING TO DIE OUT HERE! IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT, WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. SOMEONE IN A PLAID SHIRT AND A PUFFY VEST AND A TRUCKER'S HAT WITH THREE MISSING TEETH AND THREE DAYS WORTH OF STUBBBLE IS GOING TO WALK UP AND ASK IF WE NEED HELP. AND THEN HE'S GOING TO DRAG ME ACROSS THE STREET TO THAT CLOSED DOWN BAR AND THEN... HOW DO YOU FORGET TO GET GAS?? DO WE HAVE AAA?? THERE'S A PHONE NUMBER ON THE SIGN OF THAT METHODIST CHURCH ACROSS THE STREET, MAYBE WE CAN CALL THE PASTOR. WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!?!," the wife angrily thinks.

The husband swears but tries to convey a sense of confidence, while the wife is completely aware that he is just as nervous and unsure as she is. "I don't think those pink signs were on all of the pumps," he says. "Maybe if look on the other side..." He drives around to the other side and sure enough, no pink sign. The car is pulled on the wrong side of the gas tank, but they can't risk starting the engine and wasting gas, so the husband stretches the pump across the trunk of the car and squeezes the nozzle in. Wife quietly sits in the car-- stiff, scared, and nervous-- staring straight ahead, pretending to not watch the husband. Swipe the card. Select the grade. Squeeze the pump handle. Nothing. Squeeze again. Nothing. Swear. Cancel transaction. Swipe the card. Select a different grade. Squeeze the pump handle.

"Please dear God, please dear God. Let there be gas. Please don't let us be stuck out here. We're in the MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. Please let there be gas."

Swiiiiiiiiish. Oh great day of joy!! There was gas!! Gas came out!! "We're not stuck here!! We're not going to get kidnapped, raped or murdered! We don't have to call the church pastor or AAA!! I'm going to live! I'm going to graduate school and have kids! I'm not going to freeze to death!" They paid $2 a gallon for premium, but at that point they would've paid $10 a gallon. The wife prayed every single drop of that gas into the car that night (and probably the husband too). And he purchased 18.2 gallons of gas for their 18 gallon car.

Grinning, the husband climbed into the car, and started laughing. The wife did not laugh or smile. She only said her first words in over a half an hour. "HOW DID YOU FORGET TO GET GAS?? THAT WAS NOT FUNNY!! SERIOUSLY, STOP LAUGHING! DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WOULD HAVE DONE IF I HAD FORGOTTEN TO PUT GAS IN THE CAR AND STRANDED US IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE??"

I made him drive for two more hours after that little stunt. It was punishment, but it took me a good half hour for my heart rate to recover and my nerves to calm down. We were able to make it out of Illinois without further incident, then into Iowa, through Des Moines, into Omaha, then Lincoln, past York, Aurora, Grand Island, Kearney, and then off the interstate to make our grand entrance into Holdrege. We pulled in at 8:30 am local time, almost 24 hours after we left. The temperature was a whopping 3 degrees. I took a picture of the thermostat for proof.

Road Trippin' It

Here we go again... Tyler and I spend an obscene amount of time in the car. I guess we're just too cheap to fly, but I think we also secretly enjoy the time together (don't tell anyone). In a few years, we won't be able to do this and I think we'll always consider this a fun "remember when." I think it's also a test run for the three week road trip we're planning for Tyler's 30th birthday next summer. Can we really do it... Do we really WANT to do it?

We're 4 hours into our 20+ hour trip to Nebraska for Christmas. Tyler typically does most of the driving, while I do most of the singing. I have a ridiculous knowledge of music lyrics, but T has a great head bob and fills in words where he can. When we really get tired though, we break out the Broadway scores and sing at the top of our lungs. And don't be fooled- Tyler knows every word there. If you ever need two people to re-enact Rent for you...

We've made our way through Virginia, Maryland, Pennsylvania, and we're making our way through a sliver of West Virginia to get into Ohio, where I'm hoping to run into Christie and force feed her some White Castle. Yes, White Castle. I realize it's the northern version of Krystals, but it's a Way family tradition. With every trip to Kentucky as a kid, we never ever ever missed a trip to White Castle, so to me it spells nostalgia and deliciousness. I've picked out my spot for dinner! I eat in honor of my dad and in memory of my Pop Way.

We're currently going zero miles an hour on the side of a mountain (Tyler's taking construction, I'm taking accident). It was sunny for awhile, but most of the day has been spent in the rain and snow. We've driven through some great mountain towns- the kind with rooftops scattered in the mountainside and old factories and copper steeples disappear into low lying clouds. We always seem to find an old house we say we'd like to buy and fix up.

We're also taking over-unders on how many times Tyler's mom is going to call during the course of our trip (Hi Debby!). She's currently at 3, but I'll keep you updated. Any takers? We've made two bathroom stops and the most interesting town name we've seen is Flintstone.

Update (3 PM): Traffic was neither construction or accident-related. Just mystery traffic. And we just crossed a bridge into Ohio. My first time ever in the state. Honk honk!

Update #2 (8:45 PM): Took awhile to get through Ohio. Just stopped for dinner in Indianapolis and also made a quick stop at a local mall for a last minute Christmas gift for someone. Needless to say, we stood out. When we asked about sweaters in bigger sizes, we were referred to the Sean Jean area. I SO wish we had found Tyler's dad a sweater made by Diddy.

Can I get some credit?

"Mark my words, using the same logic they've used all season, the Heisman winner may or may not be the best player of the season, but will most definitely be the QB (or running back) on whichever Big 12 team comes out on top. No expertise required."

-Kate Grassmeyer, Nov. 8, 2008

Methods of Distraction...

I just finished my peripheral ortho exam and it was a DOOZY. And in case you're not familiar with my terminology, doozy does not mean easy. I went into the test with an A in the class, but who knows now... Spinal orthopedics is tomorrow and I am NOT motivated to study now. It's sort of like, what's the point?

So, in an effort to avoid impending doom, I've decided to share a Craigslist ad with you that my future SIL, Landon, forwarded to me. She'll fit right into the family if she keeps up with the mass emails to siblings... Hope this makes you laugh like I did.

You need a Ninja Hauler...or perhaps some MC Hammer pants?

An Update

So, I haven't posted lately... I knew things were going to be insane after Thanksgiving and they are! I had three tests last week, with two papers due-- one of them being our final thesis proposal, which ended up being 30 pages long. That's just our proposal, the study hasn't even been run. When all is said and done, that sucker is going to be loooooong! This week, I have a final everyday... I had the first practical slot this morning, so I was done early, only to get home and absolutely bite it on a patch of ice on my way inside. I spent the rest of my morning taping ice packs to my knee and cleaning up blood... Relaxing, right?

Tyler is out of town for a few days this week meeting with clients in Indianapolis and Dallas. It always seems to work out that he's gone during finals, which is good. It allows me to take over the house and stay up all night... He'll be back on Wednesday, just in time to help me start cleaning.

Friday night is the Russ Reid Christmas party, which is being hosted at our community clubhouse and any afterparty will carry over to our place, which means... THE BOSS IS COMING OVER! So we've got quite an extensive list of things to get done before everyone comes over. We're fully decorated (are we ever!), but having eight finals in eight days isn't conducive to keeping things tidy... We were going to just hire a maid service, but have you ever gotten quotes for that?? I'd rather get my hair done....

My friend Jess and I are heading to NYC this weekend after we both finish our finals. We'll just be there for two days, but my mom is coming up to meet me on Monday night when Jess comes back to DC. J and I are seeing Mary Poppins on Sunday night (I'm very excited) and Mom and I are seeing Spamalot on Tuesday (I saw Spam in February when T and I were there for Valentine's, but it's hilarious and I'm also very excited to see it. Who says you can tire of Clay Aiken?? Not me!) The rest of the time will be filled with bargain jewelry shopping, shady purse dealings, cupcake eating from Magnolia's, and Christmas window shopping. I am so excited! It's getting me through finals...

My time with Tucker has really progressed lately. It took some adjusting and time getting comfortable with the family, but I'm starting to see subtle changes even in just a few weeks. I haven't taken my Neurorehab or Pediatrics classes (3rd year) so I was feeling a little out of my element, but I've been to a few PT visits with Tucker and his mom to see what they do. We've developed a nice little rhythm of activities and time with him usually passes quickly. It's affirmed me in the specialty I've always thought I wanted, but never had the experience to back it up.

I think that's about all! I'll have pictures up of our holiday decor once the house is clean. We're planning on renting out our place for the Inauguration, so we have to take some pictures the place anyway for the ad. Have you seen how much people are asking?? Tyler thinks it's a little weird to have people staying here and I agree, but come on... Maybe I'm just seeing it through my salary-less grad student eyes, but we'd be fools to not take advantage of this opportunity!

Anyway, pictures and more updates later! Thanks for reading and thanks for caring. :)

P.S. I just checked out my knee-- it is SWOLLEN. I know I'm in PT school, but I've pretty much never hurt myself (unless sore thumbs from Nintendo count). I think my most drastic injury (other than cutting my finger open while trying to get into a banana when I was five) was an ankle sprain in middle school playing ultimate frisbee (Thanks, Steve... "Just run it off!"). For awhile, I thought about doing a "Gross PT Picture of the Day" on here, showing you all of the nasty injuries we look at in orthapedics, but I never started it... Maybe I should start with my knee?